This is My Story; This is Your Song

 

The cracks in my mind began to plainly show,

After three years of watching your lies flown,

Dishonesty was all I was given by this man

After learning the bitter truth about his “plan”.

Thank you for showing me the man you are,

Give my cuts time to heal as they become scars.

Purposely, I created this lyrical rhyme to speak,

Every word you spoke made the cruelty leak.

You won’t hurt me anymgore because I am smart,

Stop wasting my time because I hardened my heart.

Withholding affection because of someone else’s lies,

Shattering my heart taught me to trust myself as I fly.

Stronger because you made me face the devil’s drug,

Each painful selfish action showed me I was your rug.

Never again will I ever accept this kind of mental abuse,

Why tear me down until I decided to get a new tattoo.

After disrespectful statements began to cause my fall,

Learning to rise above the toxic comments of your lying call.

All the kindness I once felt was killed off this very night,

You made the “brown-eyed devil” come out to fight.

Those sins you committed are yours; not mine to ever bear,

Stop blaming me for losing all you had because I don’t care,

You created this drama because you decide to never trust me,

Don’t ask me to care that you lost because I am finally free.

Memorize this song as this is this last one I will write for you,

My voice is raised and you cannot tell me what I feel is not true.

Remember you made me accept your rules as well as your choice,

Not once in this dance was I allowed to have an opinion or a voice.

My time to speak is now as I choose months ago to say you're the fool,

I will tell everyone how you treated me because I was a loving jewel.

This song is yours and you will hear it as you endure life’s cruel dance,

I will tell everyone how you treated me because I was a loving jewel.

Copyright, 2020

Momma's Secret

 

By, Crystal S. Kauffman-Amon

Momma’s love destroyed me with her choices,
She had a hard time blocking out the voices.
The role models she looked up to were not the best,
Still wondering what happened to the rest?

Family curses passed on as we grew,
Hell…that is the only life I knew!
Violent tempers lead to a beating,
Leaving the family was cheating.

Friends were not worth a shit,
Take off with a friend; just to get hit.
Tell the truth and people say,
Damn girl, don’t speak that way!

I hated her for all she did to me,
Until, I became a new mommy.
I chose to forgive and stop the hate,
Once I realized that I could finally relate.

How do I keep my child away from the hell?
Never could I form the words to tell.
My family that they were toxic too,
Love kept me driving through.

Learning more about momma’s pain,
Made me understand the huge black stain.
Learning to love the broken woman she is,
Will be how I choose to handle all of this.

Healing her with my love and time,
Will be how I chose to spend my dime.
Until she takes her very last breath,
Then, I will be with her again after my death.

Understanding her life made me see,
She was never allowed to be free.
So, today I thank her for the gift of life,
My love for her still cuts like a knife.

Don’t talk about what you don’t know.
Her life is not a prime time family show,
She’s a victim of family secrets too.
Down her and just know I’ll punch you!

Copyright 2019

Picking Up My Crown

Written by, Crystal S. Kauffman-Amon

I won’t allow you to tear me down, 

Never again will I forget my crown.

You chose to play with my heart and mind, 

Now, I am free and I have put you far behind.

Stay man, don't come back and beg for another try, 

I will laugh until it is you who is the last to cry. 

I broke through all the pain and rose beyond the call, 

I choose to never again allow you to let me fall. 

Your not even worth another tear of mine,

I proved I don't need you, not one silver dime.

My worth was clouded by your choice to tear me apart.

Today, you have no place within my heart.

Walk away and live with the choices you made,

My heart will never be cut again by your silver blade. 

Judgements and rejections are all I knew,

During this selfish dance I spent with you.

Copyright 2020